ceded | [week three

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[week three - sunday]

[ It doesn't take her long to go find him.

Natalie was her immediate priority, for a number of reasons, but Percy was never far from her thoughts. It pains her to even be apart from him right now. The way he looked at the execution, the hysteria he let slip as he and Papika struggled to put out that girl's body....

She has to find him.

Where she finds him both is and isn't where she expected him to be. After all, hadn't she done this enough herself?

Xion won't talk as she levers herself down to sit beside him, looking at the grave they're now both in front of. Annabeth Chase. She honestly just hasn't had the time to spend by Riku's yet, but she probably will. She knows herself well enough to know that.

After a quiet moment, she'll just lean her head on his shoulder. ]

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[ Xion feels him tremble, and very gently threads both her arms around the one she's leaning against, hugging it loosely.

She just listens quietly to what he says, not interjecting. In fact, she's quiet even after he's done speaking, lost in thought. ]

He gave me something to hold onto. [ Reaching into her pocket, Xion pulls out ... a pocketwatch. ] He asked me to give it back if he lived. So ... I'll hold onto it until I see him again.

[ There's a steely thread in her voice as she says it. ]

... we'll get them back, Percy. I know we'll see them again. But ... do you really think we can find their killers?

[ Considering the immense size of their failure yesterday. ]

[He doesn't shake her off. Actually, he just shifts a tiny bit to burrow his face in her hair because everything's fucking terrible. He does turn just enough to eye the watch.]

...he told me about that thing yesterday. I hope he makes it back. We don't know what it's really like, unless Natalie or Seizaburo told you.

[He doesn't answer. "No" is the answer he has now but that's defeatist and also just because he's so strung out. His hands curl in his lap, bloodied and bruised and bandaged and he shakes his head.] It may not be tomorrow or anything, but we will find them. People can't hide forever, Xion. That's not how these things work. We just have to fight back even harder and keep playing.

[A pause.] I want you to be careful from now on. I don't know what's happening, but with what happened with the camera and how people convicted Tarvek...[He's concerned. Scared, probably. He's always a little scared when he's in uncertain situations even if he won't admit it, but without Annabeth it's a little worse.]

[ A soft breath shivers out of her when she feels his face press into her hair. This is both everything she needed and everything that could break her back down into pieces. ]

Tarvek is strong, [ she whispers, ] and really smart. If anyone could do it, it's him.

[ Xion shifts against him slightly, then moves one of her hands, letting it drift up his forearm until she can press her fingertips into the back of his hand just below his bruised and bloody knuckles. It's a very light touch, but a recognition of what he's done. She won't ask, at least right now, mostly because she understands why they might be that way. ]

I'll be careful. I'm not going to keep the camera anymore, and I'm going to do everything I can to learn as much as possible. But, Percy ... you too?

[ She doesn't know if she could survive finding his corpse. ]

[Sorry, Xion. He's not moving anytime soon, taking a few deep breaths to rein in his own unstable hysterical feelings. He can fall apart again later. Watching Lissa hadn't helped, but stopping Papika forced him to carry on. This, too, will force him to carry on.

His fingers twitch in response, though he won't acknowledge it. Instead, he thinks about what she says.]

He'll be okay. Clever people are always the ones who survive when they have the freedom to act. [Annabeth hadn't. He's convinced the only reason she died was that someone bound her in a way she couldn't help herself at all. He's watched her do so many amazing things just with her head and skill and though he won't say it, Xion will hear what sounds like a wet, shaky gasp to free up his throat again.]

...we need to be a lot smarter about what we do. [So it's not a promise to be careful, but acknowledgement he'll do what he can.] If we were smarter about that stupid bear trap, maybe...[He doesn't finish, exactly, but his words are bitter. It's clear he's unhappy with it, though he doesn't know how to express it yet. Xion likes Yuna, doesn't she? It wouldn't do well to upset her further. (Granted, given they were together all day, he's aware Yuna tried and Xion resisted but he's not taking chances. Not yet. Not after yesterday.)]

[ She hears it. She hears it and it threatens to snap her in half, to make her stop breathing. She doesn't show it. Just nuzzles into him a little more snugly, so he can lean against her all he wants.

Her other hand is still wrapped around Tarvek's pocketwatch, and it tightens just enough to be a visible motion. But otherwise, she won't reply. All she can do is hope, and hoping is terrifying. ]

The bear trap... you mean what Yuna was talking about? [ Xion frowns a little, her thumb sweeping across the back of his hand in a thoughtful motion. ] Percy, what ... happened with that?

[It's Xion's movements that get him to pull himself together again. Don't cry in front of the tiny, Percy, come on. But he sees the motion and sits back just enough to let themselves be more comfortable.

It's the question about the bear trap that shifts his expression even if Xion can't see him. His tone is also indicative enough though, seeing how his voice drops to something methodical instead.]

...the girls found a bear trap on the Sheriff's porch. Wide open, out in the open, right about where you guys found the camera. Papika came to get me and when I got there we were trying to figure out what to do. [There's a pause.] Yuna and Papika wanted to move it because they felt like that it would be too cruel to leave it out. Someone could get hurt, or one of the dogs could get hurt. But...the camera was meant for us to see Higekiri. So I figured the bear trap was meant for something, maybe something else to stop this week's killers.

Yuna and Papika said no. Yuna wanted to close the trap and keep it in her room so that no one would get hurt. So I grabbed a boot, set it off, and she carried it back to the hotel.

[There's another long pause.] ...I wanted to leave it. Or put it in a cell. Something. And if we had left it, we could have caught someone. [He won't say it, but the implication is clear. They would have caught the camera thief, and who he believes to be Annabeth's murderer.]

[ It makes her feel a little bereft that he moves. It is more comfortable, but she also recognizes it for what it is: Percy reining himself in. Not that she wants him to be upset, but she wants to be someone he can lean on, too, like he's trying to be for her. They're going through this together.

But she'll listen to his explanation without lifting her head, though if he can catch a glimpse of her expression, it grows increasingly troubled. Xion drops her chin and shifts so her cheek is pressed against his arm and when she speaks it's kind of a mutter. ]

I think you should have left it, too. Maybe it is cruel and unfair, but so is this game, and someone getting hurt is better than another innocent person dying.

[ Her voice dips into bitterness, and she has to sigh to shake it off. ]

... we have to be smarter with whatever we get next week.

[ She's just kind of assuming they'll get something, but it seems like a safe assumption. ]

[They are, and yet he feels responsible for keeping her spirits up and keeping her safe. He's told her time and time again that they're do things together, that there's no time to let being scared stop them from moving forward.

Being hypocritical, he thinks, would be wrong in the face of something like this. He doesn't object her movement and he stares at Annabeth's grave then, almost regretfully so as he remains silent again.]

You'd think anyone smart would know to watch their dogs and not go near a bear trap. I'm done listening to that kind of reasoning. "Oh, someone might get hurt! That would be too cruel! I'll save everyone!" That's not what being a hero is. [He's trying to stop his unbridled anger and bitterness at the situation, but try as he might it still shows a bit.] A hero isn't saving everyone possible by being pure and good all the time. A hero is knowing what's best for the people you have to protect, you know that? Sometimes people have to die and make sacrifices to save the bigger picture. [This, he knows, is also hypocritical of him. He'd do anything to save Annabeth. The gods have warned him of his personal loyalty, and though she won't know it, it's shining through now. And yet he's thinking about Luke, thinking about Kronos, thinking about the friends he's lost and losing Luke, too, to sacrifice and save the world. He wishes he could have stopped it then. He wants to think he's wiser now, but he knows he's just as lost and hopeless here.] Sometimes...people get hurt for what's right. That's just how it is. I'd rather risk someone getting hurt and us deciding what to do with them later instead of waiting around for more people to die because we sat by and let this happen. To "protect" everyone. And anyone who really thinks people won't stoop to something like this doesn't know what being a hero really means. It's about knowing what fights to pick for good, not abiding by some stupid rules that won't always apply.

[Wow okay.] ...we have to be smarter. We need as few casualties as possible, but we can't go into this blindly thinking "oh everything will be fine! We're doing something good!" People here...desperation and threats and everything like that? It does something weird to them. Annabeth and Riku were just checkmarks on someone's list. You think whoever killed them cares about what happens to us?

[He's shaking again, but he's working to keep his tone level.] Make sure someone logical handles anything we get from now on. Can you help me do that?

[ Xion can feel the tide of emotion pour forth from him almost as keenly as if it were all her own. She tucks herself down and hugs his arm and just listens as he vents all of his frustrations. It ... sounds like he's been holding them in for a while. Probably since Friday, the same way she's been trying to hold in all of the grief she only barely understands.

It's tough for her to think highly of herself. But even she knows that neither of them deserved to go through this, herself included as much as Percy. And certainly, Annabeth and Riku didn't deserve to die so horribly.

Sora... is he... that kind of hero? The kind that's pure and good? She doesn't really know. She can only sort of vaguely sense it, much less so since she came here. Really, she can't sense the kind of person he was at all anymore; it's like her connection to him has been utterly severed, which is terrifying and strangely lonely. But she remembers what it felt like, towards the end, the closer she came to reconnecting with him. And he was ... a light.

But what would he have done?

Xion has a sneaking suspicion he'd've felt like Yuna and Papika did, but she finds herself agreeing with Percy.

Maybe because she had to make sacrifices to save the bigger picture, too. She had to get hurt. And that was okay. That was the only way to save everyone she loved. ]

They mean well, [ she murmurs. ] But I wonder if they've lost anyone while trying to save everyone else.

[ That's all she really wants to say about that.

For a moment she truly buries her face in his arm, feeling all his shaking and wishing she could take it from him. But she can't. Instead, after a beat, she loosens slightly and tilts her head up to look at him properly. ]

... Shinnosuke, Noctis, and Dr. Lecter would help. [ A pause and a tilt of her head. ] Jason and Damian, too. If we can, we should try to get them involved. We can trust them to be logical.

[He knows it wasn't smart to expel so much on her, but at the same time he feels...a little better? He feels better hearing that she understands, at least, and it's enough that he can dredge up a tiny, sad smile.]

I think you might be right. [They haven't. And:] I hope they never will, but it also makes it much harder to understand and not see the flaws in their ideals.

[He looks down at her clinging to his arm and takes another breath, nodding at the list of names.] Those are people I think we can trust. Shinnosuke's...kind of a jerk, but he's doing his best. The rest are definitely good for us. Level-headed people who we can trust to make a fair choice. We'll have to watch for whatever comes next. But that's still days from now.

[So...what can they do until then?]

[ She can take it. She will take it, for Percy's sake.

Flaws in their ideals... huh....

Xion wonders briefly, to herself, if sacrifice is always necessary to get the best outcome. It's starting to feel that way. If you're not willing to give everything, how can you get anything in return? ]

Shinnosuke isn't so bad, [ she comments quietly, but that's all she'll say about it. Weird, when they seemed to have some kind of spat during the trial, huh? ]

Until then... Percy, we need to learn as much as we can. About the town, the game, and ... everyone else here. [ Her expression, all at once, is hard. ] There's so much we don't know, and every trial we have all these questions. So many of them never get answered. If we have more information to start then maybe it won't be so hard to figure out what's going on!

[He lifts an eyebrow, but chooses not to ask. If Xion wishes to confide in him later, she can, but he can't pry into who she trusts or why. He can think it's weird though. Just saying. Sorry Shinnosuke.]

The problem is that the people with any kind of information seem to be keeping it to themselves. Look at the Bandits. Look at Nisha being the Coal Miner. If people have roles in this game, they aren't saying anything to anyone which makes it way harder. I almost wish Hal was a little more willing to explain stuff. Or that we could talk to past participants?

[A pause.] Do you believe in ghosts?

I know, [ she sighs, some of the wind leaving her sails. Isn't that part of the problem? Whoever has been assigned a role... would necessarily have to keep quiet about it, or they couldn't really do their job, could they? Especially not the "hurt" roles, like Bandits and the Coal Miner. ]

We can always try asking him things, but it depends on what he's willing to answer, or ... what he thinks we deserve.

[ Defensive of the Sheriff as she's been for so long, it's clear that part nettles her.

The question gets her to look up at him in surprise. ]

Huh? Why wouldn't I?

[ wait. A pause, and Xion huffs sheepishly. ]

I forget how different everyone's worlds can be, sometimes. I've seen ghosts! I know they're real. Why?

[ halloween town is a hell of a place. ]

It's the whole "deserve" part that gets to me. We don't really have a baseline for what's effort and what we deserve. It's whatever he feels like most of the time and it seems to always change.

[There's a little laugh because yeah, people don't always believe in the weirder parts of his life.] This town and this game have been going for a while. I almost wonder if it's possible to contact ghosts. [...and maybe this is too hopeful, but.] Or, at least, we can find a way to talk to Riku and Annabeth again a lot sooner than whenever this game ends. It's possible to summon ghosts where I'm from, but I don't think I have the power to do it. Maybe Hal does.

Mm. It's really unfair.

[ It's one of the things that bothers her most about the Sheriff. If what they "deserved" was actually based on any kind of merit, even macabre merit like hurting each other, at least it would be comprehensible and also a standard they could try (if they even wanted to) to meet. But their lives often hang just on his whims, and his whims rarely seem charitable.

Xion listens to that seriously, but by the end of his explanation she looks doubtful. ]

Even if he does, do you think he would? If we could talk to their ghosts, they could tell us who killed them, and... I feel like there's no way he'll make it that easy for us.

[ She glances away, sighing through her nose. ]

But it can't hurt to ask.

There's a failsafe for the bandits, isn't there? What makes you think somehow there isn't a failsafe for our ghosts, too? But it's something we have to look into, I'm done overlooking any resources we might have.

It's...been getting a little easier to ask him for things. Sometimes we're fighting him less. Sometimes he's just as frustrating as ever. But if we don't keep asking and keep engaging with him we're never going to figure out our limits. I don't want us to fail because we didn't push back hard enough.

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[week three - sunday]

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