[week one - saturday]

[ceded]

[ Before she isolates herself - before she tries to hide away - Xion goes for a walk.

She hasn't even gone back to her room to see Pluto yet, which feels a little mean. But she feels so ... so tired, so ... thin. Thin is a strange word to use, but it's all that occurs. She feels ... like she's being pulled apart, and there's almost no substance left to her.

Walk. Move. Clear your head. It feels weird ... that in a whole week, she hasn't had to do any fighting at all.

Xion pauses in her walking when she realizes where her feet have taken her automatically -- the graveyard.

How morbid.

And yet.... despite everything, she still associates a sense of peace with this quiet place. Xion steps in, moving without thinking towards her own grave and settling down before it.

Given the day's events, she's not expecting to be interrupted. ]

... will we ... have to put Tiara, here?

[ so faintly, meant to be said to herself. ]

Comments

[ceded]

[ Xion keeps looking up at him, like he's a puzzle she needs to figure out, then looks down at the grave and sighs through her nose. ]

Uh huh. It's hard not to think about it. I feel ... so bad for Ao and Tiara. This whole system... it's so messed up. I really want to believe that together, we'll all find a way out of this, but ... I'm so tired. It's hard to believe that, right now...

[generously]

[ Xion herself is a bit of a puzzle to Claire, but he's used to having difficulties relating to others. Downsides of solipsism and all. ]

Do you think everyone here feels the same as you? [ Genuine question, although it wouldn't be a surprise if someone took it with a tone of judgement. ] If you haven't noticed, we got a few wolves in sheep's clothing here. Unlike Ao or Tiara, some will kill for the joy of it, or for some kinda promised reward, you know? Wouldn't it be better to put them underground?

[ He looks directly at the young girl, expecting an answer to his seemingly rhetorical question. ]

[ceded]

[ Wow.

Xion takes a moment to absorb that before responding. ]

There is someone... who told me that the way I feel is "normal." Which meant ... like everyone else, I guess. [ thoughtful ] So ... maybe some people do. I don't think everyone feels the same way, though. You don't, [ she points out, entirely without accusation or malice. ]

And ... I think you're right about that. There's ... some really scary people here. [ Nui, and Ash. ]

But are you saying we should ... bury them? [ a little confused and concerned at once by the "put them underground" phrasing. ]

[generously]

Let me rephrase that - would you feel sad if those scary people get the chop instead of the nice ones? [ He carefully swings the shovel like an axe, it's a short motion and from a safe distance. ]

Wouldn't that be justice?

[ceded]

[ The swing of the shovel doesn't scare her, but it does make her frown. So does his question. ]

... they might be scary, and they might be bad, but they haven't done anything yet. If they do...

[ Xion presses a hand to her chest, staring at the ground. ]

I don't know ... if it's justice. Even if they're scary, and even if I wouldn't be sad... we're all being forced to do this, aren't we? If it's not justice for us to kill Tiara, then... it's not justice to kill them either, no matter how bad they might seem.

[generously]

[ For some odd reason, her answer throws him off-guard. ]

I gotta say, you're no ordinary kid.

[ He sets the shovel down before continuing. ]

Let me ask you something - would you have done what she did? Let's say you kill someone, in what's supposedly self-defense, would you try to cover it up?

[ceded]

[ ... one person calls her normal, and one person says she's not an ordinary kid at all.

She doesn't get it.

... how can she explain ... that she can't--

Xion lifts both hands now, as if she might cover her mouth, but aborts the motion just shy of her face. ]

... only if ... I had to. That is ... [ her jaw tightens. ] ... if you turn yourself in, would that still count as playing the game? That seems to be really important to whatever is going on in this place. I'd be worried ... about the consequences everyone else might face.

[generously]

And yet not turning yourself in risks the trial of executing someone innocent of the act.

[ He lets out a sigh. ]

There are people here I need to protect, I think you feel the same way. If I ever come across as a monster in order to get to the truth, well... I wouldn't blame you for thinking I'm not human. To be perfectly honest, I confuse myself sometimes! [ that's not funny??? ]

[ceded]

No, I...

[ ... she lets it slide. Not that she knows the term, but arguing the niceties of turning yourself in or covering up your crime would just become semantics. There's still a point he's made: there's risks either way that someone innocent gets hurt.

Something about what he says then jars her, though. Her eyes get a little wide. ]

No, I ... I'd never think that! You're human, no matter what. I...

[ She pauses for a second, trying to calm herself. ]

... I do think you're really confusing. But ... you don't seem that bad. I think... we're just different. [ She smiles crookedly. ] That's okay though, isn't it?

[generously]

[ In contrast to Xion, who seems unsure of her words, he nods with absolute certainty. ]

Is that a question? I'll say I never met anyone like me, so you're not wrong. Come to think of it, I dunno if I know anyone like you either. Do you wanna be friends?

[ god he's so weird ]

[ceded]

[ Rarely in her life has she been so confused by a sing;e conversation. But ... he seems sincere. Xion blinks rapidly a few times .. and then a few times more .. before she abruptly laughs. Laughing has been so, so rare for her since she got here, it feels strange to do. But ... it's nice. ]

Yeah! Of course I'll be your friend. That actually sounds really nice. I hope we can learn more about each other!

[generously]

Hey, that's the first time I've seen you laugh.

[ Who knew all it would take was a morbid discussion at a graveyward! ]

Although I wasn't making a joke if that's what you think. You should know I'm completely serious!

[ceded]

[ That just makes her laugh again. Never ever would she have thought that after a day like today she'd have a reason to feel like laughing. The sound of it is breathless and helpless and somehow relieved. ]

I don't think you're joking! That's why it's funny. You're ... so strange. But that isn't a bad thing.

[ Xion beams at him, bright as sunshine. ]